Monday, January 5, 2009
Lahlahlah
You were almost perfect. A gentleman, even. Able to make me grin foolishly. Your flirting technique was near perfect too. You made me feel giddy, even just a little bit of attention & my heart would skip a beat. But I know I'm not for you, and you not for me. For you didn't return the same feelings and would flirt with anything with boobs, walks on two feet and has a beating heart ( you added: a beautiful face and character; remember?). I laughed but it stung a little. Due to my low self-esteem, what you said obviously meant I wasn't beautiful, or didn't have a beautiful character. I know you're not the one God has given me, because if you were the one, I'd have known it & you would have known it. And it is definately not, because God wouldn't be dumb to distract me during my major exam year. And you would have been a godly person. Maybe you are, just that you haven't grown into the man God wants you to be yet. But it's definately not time. I really got to stop thinking about you, and get you out of my head. For once, you're just someone I've brought to church and got saved but isn't serious yet. Yes, that's right. Old flames can never be relighted at the same spot again. I can imagine my heart with lots of burnt spots now, three for A, two for you, one for V, one for M and two for Jh. I'm an idiot.Hoho, today was almost slacking. All the teachers other than Mr Chan gave us an at least 1hour pep talk about the coming Os. Mrs Myreen Ang was in charge of the sec1 programme so we didn't have english lesson, instead it was a free period. Mr Chan just did simple recap. Mr Ong got psycho-ed by us to give a pep talk
(smiles really big):D, but he spent the last 15minutes introducing us to a new chapter for POA. Supposed to turn up for SJAB meeting but I didn't because my timetable has become extremely long now. I end at 2.15 everyday except on fridays. Last year, I use to end at 1.30pm on Mondays. Being in sec4 with all these new stuff hitting me like rocks really sucks. Next week my structured remedial will be starting. I thought structured remedials were supposed to start after Feb, I guess I was wrong;
bye bye, long lunch hours before going home, bye bye, freedom, bye bye, not-hardworking Zoie.My contact lenses haven't arrived yetD: I wonder when will they turn up in my letter box. I've been spending time to go down to open the letter box just to check if it has turn up yet. I think I like ranting here. Did I mention I don't like my new principal? Honestly, I don't like her. I want Mr Goh back, but MOE decided to remove principals after 5-6years of being a dictator in the school, just when I was getting used to it. The new P speaks funny, looks funny & has bad attitude with a freaky stare. She'd stare at us, sec4Es, just before going to recess, she'd stare at the people having recess in the canteen. She'd stare for no reason at all, as if going :
Tsk, tsk tsk, what am I supposed to do with this school to make it a much different school with no life, no fun and everything work, no play. Roar, me wants old P back.
Can't wait for Saturday and Sunday. I always look forward to weekends, to going to cell and church:D I'm so charged up! Haha!
Love,
Zoie Esther
